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Written by Gene Zarnick
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Monday, 15 March 2010 |
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Selection Sunday; one of the most uneventful, but exciting days of the sports year. It came and went just as it does every year.
Once the brackets are released we see debates on seeding, on easiest regional, which teams shouldn't have made it, what team should have made it, should the field be increased, what upsets will happen, what are the most intriguing match ups; all these questions are debated over and over again and again until finally we get the answer to none of them.
That's what is so great about March Madness; anyone can debate. Anyone can make an opinion, and no matter how far off based it is, it still seems legitimate due to the uncertainty that revolves around the greatest tournament in all of sports. We have a million and one ESPN analysts debating every single match up like they know what is going to happen more than anyone else. This is the ridiculous nature of March Madness; everyone thinks they know all, mostly none of us know anything.
We assume we got the system down. Always pick a couple #1's to make it to the final four, have a #12 over #5 upset in there somewhere and just pick a few more upsets along the way; that's all it takes to win the bracket. Truth be told, the winner of the bracket is usually someone who hasn't watched a second of college basketball all year.
Everyone enjoys March Madness for a few reasons. A 65 team tournament that is tough to make and tougher to win. Being able to gamble and watching your chances increase or decrease based on 63 games over a three week span, and lastly everyone enjoys an underdog.
March Madness is all about the underdog. There's more to it though then just the higher seeded team beating a lower seeded team. March Madness showcases that any underdog can prevail by utilizing the magical piece of paper known as The Bracket. The bracket allows people who have no basketball knowledge to participate in a gamble every year that brings people together in a different way than anything else in the world.
Walk into any public place during March Madness, bust out your bracket, and within five minutes you'll have someone striking up a conversation with you. It doesn't matter if you haven't seen any basketball, care about basketball, participate in basketball, or you are a diehard basketball fan; anyone can win the bracket. Is there anything else in sports that anyone can think of that will captivate and keep people wanting to watch a sport for three consecutive weeks based on a piece of paper?
I know most of you are like me, we think we got the bracket down this year and we understand how to win it. Most likely the winner of the bracket will be someone who has no knowledge and randomly picked the teams. I think everyone has been in a bracket where the winner was a girl who picked the teams based on team name or jersey color. That's what the bracket is all about.
The bracket is all about the underdog. Not just the ones participating against top seeded teams, but the underdogs that participate in brackets across the country. It's about giving everyone a shot at winning and making us believe in something that we thought could never happen. That's what March Madness is about and that's what the bracket is about.
Enjoy the madness!
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Thunder Treats & Favre Dollar Footlongs Bracket Challenge
Invitation Link (or click image): You are invited!
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1st Place: Your very own Thunder Treats AND Favre Dollar Footlongs T Shirts PLUS a $25 Gift Card to Best Buy

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Written by Gene Zarnick
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Friday, 12 March 2010 |
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It's going to happen. It's bound to happen. A #1 seed will finally face the inevitable and lose to a #16 seed. Will it happen this year? Maybe, maybe not, but the chances are higher than ever that it does.
This year is more unpredictable then we've ever seen before. Already in conference tournaments we have seen upsets that we would've never thought would happen. How do the top three seeds in the Big East tournament lose their first games? This is clearly the best conference and the three best teams lose in the quarterfinals. That's what college basketball is all about, upsets we almost don't want to believe happened.
Everyone claims this is a down year for college basketball. It all depends how you look at it though. Maybe I'm an optimist; always looking at the glass as half full, instead of half empty, but this just means more excitement. For once we don't have any teams that have a clear path to the final four, let alone to a championship. There really aren't many top tier teams that seem dominate. Every team has their flaws and they can be beat on any given night.
Okay, I know you've heard that before. Every year it seems like when we get to Selection Sunday we here that same phrase; this year it's true though. Look at the top teams, Kansas, Syracuse, Kentucky, Duke, Ohio State, and Kansas State. That's all we got, six teams that seem like they have a shot. Usually were debating about 20 teams that have a shot at a 1-4 seed, this year it's what team is going to grab the open #2 seeds. It's really a territory we've never seen before.
I think the misconception that people have this year is that the lower teams aren't any good, that's not true. I just think that teams are much more equal from top to bottom. Does any #1 team really want to play a Notre Dame team that will probably end up with a #8 or #9 seed in the second round? Just because we don't know the bottom tiered teams as much and they don't look as great, doesn't mean that they're any worse than last year; they're probably actually better.
This is the year. I'm making a prediction that this is the year that a #1 goes down. Syracuse could go down against a #16 team that can shoot well against their zone, Duke could lose because if they don't hit shots then they suffer, Kentucky could lose if they don't play with cohesiveness and their lack of experience, and Kansas could lose if some of their big time players don't show up in the first round.
So who's going to lose? Who is the team that will become the laughing stock of college basketball and be considered amongst one of the biggest upsets of all-time?
My guess is Kentucky. Sorry Wildcat fans, but I just think if there's any team that is going to blow it in the first round it's going to be Kentucky. Maybe it's just a gut feeling. I'm probably completely wrong. They'll probably win by 40 points.
If it happens, I'm a genius. If it doesn't then whatever, no big deal.
Maybe the upset will happen, I hope it does. Not for the sake of my genius forecast, but for the love of college basketball and a chance to see the upset that we have anticipated happening for years.

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Written by Gene Zarnick
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Tuesday, 09 March 2010 |
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Last Tuesday I brought to everyone's attention The Top Ten Types of People at the Gym. After some great feedback and comments from readers about some of the types of people I neglected to berate I decided I needed to do something about it. That's why this Tuesday I am bringing to you Part 2! If you missed the first one, check it out here. If you already read it then enjoy the new additions.
The SSS Guy - This of course is the Shit, Shave, Shower Guy. Every gym has a couple individuals who fulfill their complete set of daily hygiene duties at the gym. Added to those three duties they may even bring their toothbrush for a fresh cleaning and worse off start clipping their toenails while sitting in the aisle way. I'm all for good hygiene, but there is the time and place to get some of the things done and the gym isn't the place for it.
The Sweaty Immigrant - I'm not going to act like my shit doesn't stink, but for one reason or another people from other countries reek. This is the guy that you immediately know can speak a different language other than English and he didn't have to use Rosetta Stone to do so. It doesn't matter if this guy wipes down the bench or machine when he is done with his sets because the putrid smell will linger throughout your workout. If he does fail to towel his residue then you should stay far away from that machine; maybe even out your workout early and go home. It may be necessary.
The Lady Tennis Player - Also known as The Grunter, this person has to make animal sounds after every rep. It's the loud, forced, let you know I'm here and lifting lots of iron noise that is emitted from this person. It echoes across the gym and you can't help, but look at how ridiculous this person sounds every ten seconds.
The Smoke Breaker - It seems like there are probably two things that would be extremely frowned upon to break for during your workout. One being stopping to grab an extra value meal at Mickey D's and the other is stepping outside to go smoke a chode. There's usually one in every gym that just needs that quick hit of nicotine to get them through their routine. I don't know what would be worse, breaking while at the gym or running out for a cig while the homily is being spoken during church. Either way, this person needs a patch, a piece of gum, or some hypnosis to help them.
The Prison Cellmate -This is the guy that still thinks he's locked up in the pen and won't move out of his 4x4 area of the gym. He runs there, does pushups there, lifts weights there, stretches there; he probably even changes there. He's usually heavily tatted and only focused on his box. He will not step outside of it. Go up to this guy and bet him a pack of cigs that you can lift more than him. I bet he'd do it.
The Nipple Shirt Dude - This is the muscular guy who just so happens to cut his sleeveless t-shirt close enough to the just that his nipples hang over the outer edges. He's probably closely acclimated with the Metrosexual or The Man in the Mirror. He usually likes to throw in an abdominal workout in-between sets while he's benching just so his shirt can turn up enough for everyone to see his six pack. When he's finished he'll stand up and rub his stomach muscles just to make sure they're still there.
The Metrosexual - If you're styling your hair to come to the gym then you're in the wrong place. This is the guy or girl who walks in stuntin with their Gucci shades on and their hair all done up like they just got off the jersey shore. Usually bronzed to the fullest and ready to show everyone in the gym what they're all about. The girl usually puts on his Pat Benatar attire to workout in with her leggings and headband while the guy will wear his Adidas tearaways, tight Affliction T, and spiked hair that could puncture a porcupine.
The Super Sanitizer - There's a Mr. or Mrs. Clean everywhere. This is the person that leaves the machine more wet from sanitizer then it was with sweat. They can't handle just spraying a paper towel and wiping the machine down, nope, they have to grab the bottle, bring it to their machine and give it a full on super soaker style shooting. I think I've even seen a person or two bring their own Lysol wipes with them.
The Set Master - This one is a combination of two different types of people that could fit. The first is the person that takes forever to do their sets. They pause for about fifteen minutes during each one and really drag on the entire workout. You walk up to this person and ask if they're almost done and they're almost appalled, exclaiming, "Two more sets bro!" The other type is the jump in set person. They can't handle waiting an extra thirty seconds and they have to ask, "You mind if I jump in?" Of course most of us are nice and say yes, but it's not really that hard to wait a minute.
The Man in the Mirror - Some people like to watch themselves in the mirror at the gym while they're working out. That's fine, I don't care if you do or don't, but this is the person who takes it to the extreme. They will stand four feet back from the dumbbell rack staring into the mirror during each curl to try and see their veins pop and then suddenly they stop abruptly. Not because they are injured or something happened, but because someone walked in front of them. They can't workout without a mirror and it's a debacle if the sight of their reflection is hidden at all by someone moseying on by. This person needs to attend narcissistics anonymous. That may be the funniest anonymous meeting you could ever witness. Oh wait, just watch Tool Academy and it's the same thing.

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Written by Gene Zarnick
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Monday, 08 March 2010 |
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Championship week is here and for the first time in awhile there's no excitement for it. We've reached the point in March where the greatest four weeks of sports are about to begin and nobody cares. I see it differently.
College basketball has had a down year. The caliber of teams hasn't been as good. There are no real dominate teams. Everyone seems beatable. All these factors will make the conference tournaments that much better.
I think people are missing out on why college basketball is so special. There aren't any other sports that have meaningful conference tournaments like college basketball has. Where else will you ever find a tournament before the tournament that could decide the fate of so many teams and whether or not they make it into the playoffs? No where.
That's why these tournaments that have begun and will continue through Sunday are so special, because there is so much riding on it. It's not just about the teams involved in each conference, but the bubble teams looking in hoping a spot doesn't get popped, and they always do. College basketball has been down this year, but it's about to pick back up. The Big East tournament is always amazing. Something about the aura of Madison Square Garden just brings out the best in these conference rivals.
I don't think I have to remind anyone about Syracuse/UConn last year.
We have potential for big matchups like a Duke versus Maryland, Kansas versus Kansas State and Syracuse versus Villanova, but we know from years past that the best matchups are the ones we don't see coming.
Another thing I hope I never see comes is the expansion of the 65 team field for March Madness. I could talk for awhile about how it dilutes the field or makes it less meaningful to make it to the big dance, but what it really is going to do is take away from Championship Week.
If the field was expanded to 96 teams then teams like UConn, Illinois, Rhode Island, Memphis, Dayton, Washington, and Ole Miss would not have to be worrying about making it. What makes the 65 team field so great is that it is still difficult to make it. You can have 20 wins in a power conference and still not get in.
I don't want 96 teams. I don't want to debate about how every single team from the Big East should make the tournament and I don't want to see North Carolina playing for their life in the ACC tournament hoping they grab a 15th seed in the NCAA's so they could go up against a 9th seed.
I love how college basketball is right now. I love the 65 team field, I love the play-in game, and of course I love all of March Madness. What's missed though is that the conference tournaments are really what will set the scene for next week's playoff games.
There's nothing like March Madness in any other sport and there's nothing like the conference tournaments that we are thankfully graced with every year in college basketball. Let's just sit back and enjoy them for what they are; a glimpse of what March Madness will be like.
I just hope we don't increase March Madness because then the conference tournaments would disappear.

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Written by Gene Zarnick
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Friday, 05 March 2010 |
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Everyone has a superstition or two. Whether it's wearing a specific tie to a job interview or growing a playoff beard to coincide with your team growing one, superstitions are a part of our lives.
Why do we do have them though? What makes us want to repeat a task or have some sort of special clothing or item that we need to make us feel like everything is going to be alright?
Sports fans might be some of the most superstitious people. We have to wear our team's jersey; we can't bet on our team; we need to be eating the same food at the same time at the same place with the same people every single week, just to feel like our team is going to win.
Basically a superstition is a way for us to find comfort. Every big game that our team faces brings us nervousness; superstitions help shield it. They just help to alleviate some of the problems going on and make us think that we can help our teams in a positive way.
We've all had the feeling at one time or another where we felt we were the cause for a miscue. Someone said something right before a play or we forgot to wear our lucky shirt. Finding blame is much easier to place on ourselves then to place on our teams.
Even announcers believe in superstitions. How many basketball games have you seen where the announcer talks about how great a free throw shooter the guy on the line is and then he misses one? They always take the blame and say they jinxed him.
I have plenty of minor superstitions. My worst superstition however is for my favorite team in all of sports; Duke Blue Devils basketball. Every game that Duke has I have to wear the same color shorts that they are wearing. I have about eight pairs of Duke shorts because of this and since Duke keeps changing their jerseys it becomes a task just to keep my wardrobe up-to-date. I don't know why I do it. It's not like I think I'm part of the team, I just think I'm helping the team by doing so. I also have to change the channel for a minute or two if they start to lose. Most people have done that a time here or there thinking the outcome will change if they're not watching.
The real reason sports fan have so many superstitions is that they help us feel like we're in control. There's nothing worse than just having to sit and watch your team fail. In the big moments of the game we want to feel like somehow, in some little way, we were partially responsible. It's our way of being part of the team, to show our support, and have a belief that our teams will always prevail.
Maybe I really can't control the game, but I can control my superstitious behaviors. If we can't believe in superstitions then what can we believe in? I know that statement sounds ridiculous, but superstitious are just our beliefs; transformed into a manner that allows us never to waiver in our thought process.
Everyone says you got to see it to believe it. I say you just got to feel it to believe it.

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